Stupid Human takes a trip to Equestria. But not the Equestria that he was wanting.
* Voted Twice as the #1 Comedy FanFic on Equestria Daily *
Well, what can I say? This is the story of a man. Or maybe he was... a pony-man. Or maybe he was just a... Pony! But he was still...
FIREWAAAAAAAALLLL!!!!
... Yeah, this is that story. The story where a guy goes to a party and wakes up in Ponyville. That guy (I know him as 'me') seems to have landed in his own personal little heaven. Hell, I even brought me a pack of endless cigarettes. How does that not kick all kinds of flank?
So yeah, everything was awesome. The End.
Well, except for The Nightmare. And Trixie. And some jerk named David. Then there was that Azure Flora pony. And that skank princess that steals my goddamn phone!
Listen, summaries just... They just don't cut it. If you want the story, it's provided right here.
Twilight Sparkle is hailed as one of Equestria's greatest minds, but she has always felt like there was a missing link that she could never understand. She started to understand a bit more when a horned, winged version of herself fell from the sky.
When Starlight Glimmer cast her spell and shattered the bonds connecting the Elements of Harmony, she inadvertently created a cosmic crack that would have further reaching consequences than she could ever imagine. The consequences of her actions rippled across time and space, shattering the very destiny of existence itself. The only thin string holding the universe together now is Twilight Sparkle, the representative of the Element of Magic and the Princess of Friendship. But with destiny already defied, how can she hope to pick up the pieces of a broken reality? Well, starting with helping her other self might help.
Cover art created by myself. Shoutouts to Vebuzurr for being my proof-reader.
Alex Weaver’s day couldn’t have been worse; an uncomfortable call from his mother, a surprise visit at work from his ex-girlfriend, and a trillion-dollar device exploding in his lab, transporting him to some frozen wasteland. Damn Mondays.
Twilight has the opportunity of a lifetime. For the past few months, she has been tirelessly toiling to successfully teleport an asteroid from low-Equan orbit, to be the first to touch a piece of the sky. But at the moment of truth, Discord rears his face, and things go pear-shaped. Now, tired and depressed, Twilight feels like her chance to contribute to the knowledge of ponykind is slipping from her grasp.
On Earth, things are going swimmingly. More than thirty years have passed since the Great Reformation, and Humanity finally stands united in their strive for peace and progress. Poverty has been all but eliminated, space is beginning to be colonised, and Earth’s government and its citizens have a healthy relationship. Usually.
In a bizarre turn of events, a scientist vanishes in a flash from his lab, leaving his colleagues and superiors intrigued. It likely would have remained a mystery, another entry to the Universe’s long list of the unexplained. It would have been pondered, and eventually forgotten, had they not received a message back.
A message containing coordinates to a curious star.
Warning: May contain math, science, linguistics, and interspecies sex. You have been warned.
Twilight finds herself wanting to know more about Celestia and Luna. So she ends up time travelling!
Princess Twilight, for all of her knowledge, didn't particularly know that much about Celestia or Luna's past. In an attempt to figure out more about her peers she digs up the infamous time travel spell. Jumping at the chance to gather first-hoof about the only other immortal ponies she dives head first into the past!
Finding that she has stumbled into helping the Princesses on a mighty quest she isn't hesitant to lend a helping hoof but her resolve is quickly tested when not all is what it seems and the past, and present, of Equestria is put at stake!
Follow Twilight, and the would-be Princesses, across the world as they track down dangerous artefacts, delve into dilapidated dungeons and avoid disaster in a race against time itself!
Romance will, eventually, be between Luna, Celestia and Twilight.
This story will include gratuitous amounts of cuteness at times.
There will be action and a little dark here and there, but only because it's the past and fighting does occur. It won't be a regular thing, trust me.
There is time travel and Twilight will be jumping around the timeline. But don't think about it too much!
The AU tag is only there due to the Princesses still being there, as well as the whole world existing before Equestria thing.
The world this story takes place in is: Equestria and Beyond. I absolutely love the detail which was put into this. Obviously there's parts not included, such as the Crystal Empire, etc.
I'm thankful to Dusk Melody for reading through and helping me realise the direction I wanted the story to go in.
Spelling, grammar and general thoughts have been provided by TheGreatEater
After an evil necromancer curses some of the mane six's closest friends, they're forced to reconcile to the fact that there might not be a cure. What does a pony do who only has a year to live?
What's a pony to do when they know they've only got a year to live?
That's the question facing some of the ponies closest to the mane six, after a horrible curse has stolen all but their last year of life away. As Twilight Sparkle scrambles desperately for a cure, they're forced to face the awful reality that she might not find it in time.
Local human shows up at night, drunk. Rarity finds out why.
Rhys, the local human, is not particularly socialable. Indeed, he spends most of his time in house out towards the edge of Ponyville or else with Twilight working on how he is going to get home. He talks about home a lot.
One night, quite unexpectedly, Rarity finds him outside her door. He is very drunk.
She's annoyed by this, though less annoyed when she discovers the reason why.
Trapped in the world of the breezies, Twilight has to learn how to be a breezie and help her clan make it through the winter. And like every time learning is involved, she is quite eager
Her expedition failed, Twilight is trapped in the world of the breezies, unable to tell when, or where the portal will re-open.
In the meantime, she must do her best to survive, to find a clan, and of course-
A newly hatched changeling feels like the world around is more strange than it should be but can't understand why.
After losing her hive, Queen Chrysalis is forced to start another one. Luckily she has the help of a few loyal subjects who never accepted their fellow changelings new way of life. They must stay hidden from enemies, collect enough food to survive and rebuild their strength. Now the first brood has hatched and there is something very different about one of the larva.
The world is vast and so is time, but not even that can hide the existence of an ancient city forever.
A post-apocalyptic story about exploring ruins, the mistakes of another civilization, and memory.
No one must ever know, This land where we must go, They hoped and shared their love, Yet death rained from above, The scars of passing linger on, Through empty husks and unheard songs. Although they now live in my heart, The truth still hurts...where do I start?-Twilight Sparkle
Coverart by this guy who is awesome. THIS GUY Also, major thanks to Luna-tic for helping me edit this sucker! Perhaps even bigger thanks to Obabscribbler who made a radio play of it. You can find that radio play HERE!
Hi. I'm Alexander Stepanowski. I'm a Brony. Today I discovered that Equestria is real. No, I didn't go there. I may have, uh, accidentally - let's go with that - abducted one of the princesses. Now, before you get too angry with me, I swear there's a perfectly logical explanation for this!
And for why I now ask myself if it's okay to love a Pony.
Celestia responds to the friendship lessons penned on behalf of her faithful student by the newest ponyville weirdo.
When Anon takes the liberty to inject his particular brand of humor into Twilight's friendship lessons, Celestia feels the need to respond, more often than not.
For longer than she can remember, the Princess of the Sun has been trying to bear an heir to the throne with no success. No stallion, no gryphon, no creature in the whole of Equus has been able to give her what she has wanted for so long. A child. A baby.
But there is a new being in her little kingdom, one that she happens to be very familiar with. One that wasn't born on Equus. One who might be able to make her wish come true.
Twilight is able to translate a song from outer space for all the world to hear
A song from space arrives to Equestria and everypony is in love with it. The problem is that nopony can understand the words that are being said. Twilight, determined to let the world know about the first transmission from space, creates a machine that allows her and others to finally hear the lyrics of the song.
An older, wiser Trixie Lulamoon just so happens to have a somewhat above average student.
An older, wiser Trixie Lulamoon just so happens to have a somewhat above average student named Sumac Apple, whom she takes to meet with Twilight Sparkle, as Twilight is holding a contest, looking for the best and brightest students.
Sumac Apple just so happens to have a Horrendous Hypothesis that will not only change the lives of himself and Trixie, but holds an ominous warning for all of Equestria.
Princess Twilight Sparkle wakes up one night to find Trixie Lulamoon has... turned evil? Nope. But that might have been simpler. Twilight never thought the night would come where she'd debate the very nature of existence itself with Trixie!
Twilight was supposed to present a spell that would revolutionize Equestria. Instead, she uncovered secrets that the world—and Trixie—hoped would remain hidden.
A changeling conquers, a changeling breeds, a changeling spreads their influence far and wide and woe betide those fools that would stand in their way. Or at least thats how it should be anyway.
Great magic costs great sacrifice and unfortunately for Twilight and her friends it means losing the ability to have foals. This wasnt a big deal for most as they didnt mind adopting but of them, Applejack, Starlight, Twilight, and her mother all want their own flesh and blood, though for different reasons.
As such they have sought out the only thing on Equestria that can sow a barren field, a changeling queen. Plans quickly went off the rails after that.
Kink warnings Futa on female, stomach bulging, cum inflation, Impregnation, egg insertion, sort of non con, rough as hell sex, hypnotism, mind magic, accidental sort of incest. And probably more that I'm forgetting.
