Nightmare Moon banished Celestia, only to be defeated by Ahuizotl. Ponykind were made the scapegoats to blame for her scourge. 1000 years they pray for a saviour to deliver them. Anypony will do. Enter the last hope, a pizza delivery dude.
"Ponykind must have run out of colours when they finally got to this pony. Everything from his mane to his ass was all seven colours of gloom and doom. He was so dark and brooding he probably ate glittery emos and shat vampire bats.” - Quote of the Week
1000 years the ponies have prayed for a saviour to deliver them, whether it was their long lost sun goddess Celestia, or even Nightmare Moon, maybe even the chaos lord Discord, anypony! After suffering under the yoke of a tyrant god for so long, they decided any saviour will do, even a dark demonic overlord. One unicorn sorceress finally decides to take matters into her own hooves. She sets out to the frozen ruins of a long lost Empire in the Crystal Mountains bearing a grand sacrifice of 1000 ponies in an attempt to summon the dark demonic overlord of the Crystal Empire.
When the dark ritual turned up a blank, the universe decides to shuffle in the next best thing. Will he rise up to the expectations of his newfound flock? He'd better, and quickly, for the tyrant god's inquisition is out to get him and the 1000 'blasphemers' involved in his summoning. With a nation to build and an evil tyrant god to fight, never has there been a taller order to fill. But it's alright, he's a dark demonic overlord, right? He quickly finds that with some smokes and mirrors and the help of 1000 very magical ponies, anyone can look the part, even an entirely magic-inert pizza delivery dude.
Now a long-haul fic! Many thanks to everyone who convinced me to make this a reality!
Somebody kindly messaged me and told me I should announce here that the story was featured from 27 - 30th of April. I completely missed that but many thanks for making that possible, everyone!
Cover Art: Placeholder drawn by me. Will be a background for a full cover at some point.
Princess Luna comes to cuddle and snuggle with you whenever you have trouble sleeping. These are stories of the nights you spend with her.
You have some pretty serious insomnia. Thankfully, though, there's this beautful, cuddly pony princess that's figured out how to come to earth, and for some reason, she's chosen to help you with your sleeping problem with lots of physical affection and snuggles.
Within this tome are the accounts of some of the nights you've spent together, complete with graphic cuddling detail.
EDIT: Woke up to seeing this featured, 3/6/18! Thanks! EDIT: Featured at #2 same day- Rock n' Roll!
Nightmare Moon's about to return and Equestria needs a savior, but don't worry: Celestia's got everything under control. Just as long as Twilight goes to Ponyville on time, and not to Moondancer's party instead--but why would she ever do that?
Princess Celestia has been planning for this day for years: the return of Nightmare Moon, the restoration of the Elements of Harmony, and the ushering of Equestria into a new age of friendship and love. Now that it's finally arrived, all she has to do is wait for Twilight to get to Ponyville, make some friends, hunt down the Elements, and save the...
Wait, what'd that letter say?
She didn't get on the chariot?
She went to whose party instead?
Oh. Oh, this could be bad. And more importantly, it's gonna need some hooves-on interference from Celestia to get her master plan back on track. But it'll probably all work out in the end. After all, how big a deal could one party be?
Third-place finalist in Aragon's "Comedy (Is Serious Business)" contest
An unpleasant Hearth's Warming Eve takes a turn for the newly returned Princess Luna when an unexpected fan reminds her that there's much more to her than Nightmare Moon.
Galaxy Hair really wants to take over the whole day/night shtick, and y'know, just make it night for like, ever. Problem is, Anon wants to sleep, but forever is a long time so, yeah. He's gonna try and do something about that. Key word, 'try'.
An accidental magnum opus. With 1000 likes. What the fuck is wrong with you people.
Thanks for letting this get featured one last last time, you fucks
4/06/2019 Jesus, guys, I just wanna sleep 11/27/2019
. . . . .
You're Anon, the sole human of Equestria. You've been living there for, er... you can't really recall. A year, two maybe? Anyway, every year, from what you've gathered, there is one day. One goddamn day that really pisses you off. The 'Summer Sun Celebration' comes around every (your time) August 16th, and it is literally the longest day of the year.
You would have no problems with this—if only it didn't start at four in the fucking morning.
This year just seems to be extra against you; an evil deity that's been banished to the moon for a thousand-so years decides to come back, and boy is she a bitch.
As I've explained to LD, the rating bump from Teen to Mature wasn't exactly my call. A staff member kindly notified me of the rules regarding swearing in the long description of a Teen rated fic. There is no sex, no gore, just pure stupidity without the restraints of a T holding it back.
Spike is a playboy prince, sent by his mother, Princess Celestia, to deal with preparations in a town called Ponyville. Twilight encourages him to make some friends. He decides to fuck the evil out of Nightmare Moon instead.
Rainbow Dash finds herself facing two of the most nefarious villains Equestria has ever known! She's also positively STACKED, for some reason or other...
The paragon of Loyalty, Rainbow Dash, discovers that she's facing not one but two of the premier evildoers of Equestria! Finding herself facing off against a pair of baddies is bad enough, but her troubles don't stop there - no, she's somehow sprouted a pair of exceedingly succulent bosoms! Oh, and before I forget, said miscreants are also extraordinarily large and excessively well hung...
Kinks Include: Futa on Female, Spitroasting, Threesome, Oral, Vaginal, Cumflation (Cum Inflation), Oviposition, one VERY Stacked Pegasus, Body Modification/Transformation, Various Positions, Implied Impregnation, and Caving to One's Carnal Desires
Artwork by Elzzombie
If you want to help support me, I have a Tip-Jar/Patreon HERE
What happens when Deadpool, the Merc with the Mouth, lands in the magical land of Equestria? Same thing that happens in every cross story, but with more Deadpool!!!
Meet Deadpool: a mercenary, an assassin, and overall, an antihero in the Marvel Universe. He has the ability to quickly heal, thanks to some tests made from the Weapon X Program that healed his incurable cancer, but left his mental stability down the toilet. If any of you know the real Deadpool, don't worry, he's not the same silent freak played by Ryan Reynolds in the piece of s**t prequel starring Hugh Jackman as a short guy with metal claws. If you have no idea who or what is going on, please, look it up. Meet Equestira: A magical land that hosts many mythological creatures, but mostly god horses, unicorns, pegasi, and boring horses. Everything is ruled by two god horses; Princess Sun Butt and Princess Moon Cheeks. Sun Butt rules during the day, controls the sun, protects land from monsters, indulges in male anatomy shaped fruit & cake, and abducts children... at least that's what wikipedia says. Moon Cheeks rules the night, controls the moon, plays with people in the 'apple master race', haunts children as the next Freddy Krueger, and plans how to take over the world when no one is watching. There's also six horses that act as the 'mane' stars and a bunch of other background & side characters that this Fan Base loves... like this girl that... loves... rocks. I don't get it.
Starlight Glimmer rewrote history, erasing the Sonic Rainboom and stranding Twilight in an Equestria that suffered one disaster after another until it was barely recognizable. Twilight has to act fast if she ever wants to see her home again.
Starlight Glimmer had the perfect plan: using Star Swirl's time travel spell, erase the Sonic Rainboom and everything it did. After failing to stop her, Twilight was returned abruptly to an Equestria that bears little resemblance to her home, where the other Elements of Harmony don't even know her name.
It should've been simple then: use Star Swirl's magic to return to the past and stop Starlight from changing things. Unfortunately for Twilight, all the magic in the Cutie Map is gone. She'll have to find another way to put Equestria right, and fast. After all, the Elements didn't stop Nightmare Moon...
This story is sponsored by Two Bit as a Patreon reward. If you'd like me to write your awesome story idea, that's the place. Cover by Zutcha.
Upon her return and when confronted by the new Bearers of the Elements of Harmony, Nightmare Moon decides to summon the foulest creature to ever exist (at least she thinks so).
Free at last, Nightmare Moon just got back from her thousand years banishment on the Moon.
She barely has time to cast a few spells and terrorize the local village and kidnap the Solar Princess that a group of mares burst into the ancient throne room.
As they manage to reactivate and wield the Elements of Harmony, Nightmare Moon tries to summon the foulest beast she can think of to protect her.
Time has forgotten him, but when Luna returns from the moon, he comes back to Equestria. What zany adventures will this ancient being get into once he returns to a peace-loving land?
Ages ago, Firefly flew across the Rainbow, to find help in dealing with Tirek. She came back with a human, Megan Williams. The Diplomat to Ponykind, wielder of the Rainbow of Light.
That was not the only help the wild magic of the land brought forward.
A human appeared near a magical fountain, near a mare that carried two fillies inside her. Armed with a sword that could slay anything and unending life thanks to said fountain, this second human came back with the mare to Dream Valley, and earned a reputation as The Sword, for he defended Ponykind against the darkness when the Diplomat could not soothe things over.
That was two ages ago. Time moved on. The Windigoes came. The Unification happened. Discord happened. The Crystal Empire happened. And the human remained by his foster daughter's side through all of this.
Until Nightmare Moon happened, and he nearly raised his sword against his daughter.
So he left, to seek solace, to seek guidance from the world itself from what he'd nearly done. But when the mark on the moon vanished, the human took note of that...and the day that happened afterwards.
Now...he's come home.
ADDITIONAL TAGS: Adventure, all the ponies. This is essentially a rewrite with one more character being added into the mix, to see what happens. He's not a 'seventh element of harmony.' I will admit in later chapters he might seem overpowered, but remember...
Whatever magic you practice...has a price. He just has the ability to bounce back from almost anything...eventually.
Warning: There will be sex in later chapters. And this is another story the Ausbrony and I have written together. Rather than seperate it out, I'm just gonna tag it Mature now.
EDIT: Featured on the DAY it was posted. My fans are nuts. In a good way.
SECOND EDIT: Cover art! Commissioned by iakovl, done by Atlas-66.
Jacob was just an ordinary student the year the whole world changed. It started with the powers, powers that seemed to be spreading. Can he get to the bottom of this mystery and take back his life before there's nothing left to save?
A few months have gone by since the last season of MLP, and it seemed as though the fandom would slip quietly into obscurity. But strange things are happening, things nobody can explain. People who have never seen the show report sightings of strange monsters wandering at night. Bronies develop strange powers, and sometimes they disappear. Strangest of all are the blurry images of familiar characters, all seeming convinced of terrible danger just around the corner.
Jacob never imagined his life would be anything but ordinary. He’d finish his degree, make a living, maybe have a few kids. Until he almost got eaten on his way home from school and found himself thrust headlong into danger he could barely understand. Jacob (and his humanity) may not survive it.
"I am Friendmaker!" -- Twilight is concerned she may one day go insanely evil, as with Nightmare Moon or Daybreaker. Knowing Twilight, you think she's just going to wait for it?
"I am Friendmaker!"
Twilight Sparkle is concerned that she may one day go insanely evil, as with Nightmare Moon or Daybreaker. So, knowing Twilight, do you really think for one moment she's just going to wait for it to happen?
Includes the charter members of the Reformed Villains Society, plus Celestia and Luna, and a brief magic-journal cameo from Sunset Shimmer.
Featured from 9/11-9/16, 2018... wow! Thanks, everypony! It wouldn't have happened without all of you! By way of a thank you, I've uploaded a higher-res version of the cover art for those who asked for it. Enjoy!
A young griffon found a few weeks after the events of Nightmare Moon on the grounds of the castle. The questions continue to mount over time with no solid answers as they find that communicating with the young griffon going to be more challenging.
A few weeks have passed after Nightmare Moon's defeat and Princess Luna's freedom and she has returned to Equestria to rule once more by her sister Celestia's side. However, a mysterious young griffon is discovered, and the questions about this young unknown griffon grow as Celestia and many others try to find out how and where he came from.
No solid answers come and communicating with the young griffon is going to be more of a challenge then they could believe.
(The one rule is revealed in Chapter Six. If you wish to be spoiled, reveal the spoiler, but if not, read to Chapter Six. Also, if there is a better way of wording this, please let me know.)
The one rule is: Letting someone hold the Griffon's (Young one's) plush and returning it to him is for him to have absolute trust in someone without the need for words.
Chapter 1: Proofread by Truthseeker Chapter 2 to 4: Proofread by Katarina Mau Chapter 5.5: Checked over by Mr_Mopey Chapter 65.5, 75.5: proofread by Akira Dragonborne
Princess Luna still feels alone, nineteen years after her return to Equestria. When she finds a friend in an online game, everything seems better. But not all is well in Equestria, and a sinister plot threatens everything that Luna holds dear...
Princess Luna still feels alone, nineteen years after her return to Equestria . But when she finds a friend in an online game, everything seems better. She can be herself without worrying about what others think, and she can finally talk to another pony, even if he never knows who she really is.
Celestia is worried about her sister, especially right now. Upcoming peace talks with a powerful new nation mean that all the Princesses need to be completely ready. With her Luna so absorbed in a fantasy world, she wonders how she'll make it through the harrowing weeks to come.
Button Mash feels like a failure. He's still living at home, he still can't find work that can use his degree from the university, and he still feels alone. His friends are getting married, starting families, and thriving in their careers. On the plus side, he plays games regularly, and his best friend is a mare, even if she doesn't know his name. He hopes that his upcoming vacation to Canterlot might help his mindset.
But, unbeknownst to all of them, a sinister web within a dark plot threatens to ensnare Equestria... And Luna may be the only one able to stop it.
She may face it alone, or maybe she'll have some help from her knight in faded armor...
Follows canon up to about season 4 or so. I'm not sure when everything went off the rails, but it was originally as true as possible when initially written.
Trapped in Equestria and looking to leave, one Human will take it upon himself to fight the elite 4 of his local Magic High School for answers.
Transported here through mysterious means, a human finds himself trapped in Equestria, and trapped with all its inhabitants! Conscripted into the Ponyville school for the magically adept (despite being entirely inept) our displaced hero attempts to uncover his past, and how he came to be in Equestria, making enemies and new friends along the way! Join him as he stylishly smashes his way through those that would keep him down, with only a little purple mare and his human vigor to carry him to victory!
A man of dark magic and dreams of domination was flung into an unsupecting world of ponies. Watch as years later this dark lord faces down the greatest challenge he's ever known: parenting.
"It's not easy to be the bad guy. Sometimes you've got to raise towers of iron and magic in a testament to your power. Sometimes you've got to blanket the land in black flame just to uphold idle threats. And sometimes you've got to remind a filly that she is grounded - that's right, I mean you, missy. Don't give me that look, you've got homework to do." - Excerpt from An Interview With Lord Ironblood.
Forgath Ironblood is a man who values power and might. He spent untold years developing his dark magics, and years more using ice and iron and balefire to claim and rule his domain. But it didn't last; a group of bold and plucky rebels broke into his inner sanctum and unleashed a magic he was unprepared for, a magic that cast him into the void between worlds. At that point, he was no longer their problem and the peasants rejoiced.
The world he fell into, however, was another story. It was a world rich in magic. A world full of innocents. A world he could bend to his will and carve a new domain out of.
He never knew what hit him.
Idea adopted from Whiskylullaby, as seen here, written entirely for the fun of it.
Chapters are dated for the reader's convenience; BNM for "Before Nightmare Moon", and AB for "After Banishment".
Edit 14/3/2019: Had to remove the Drama tag because I wasn't allowed to save edits to the description due to too many tags due to the new rules.
I was enjoying a quiet day at work, when I suddenly find myself in what I can only describe as what a person high on drugs would see, before a blinding rainbow light slams into me and knocks me unconscious.
Upon awakening, I find something very off, not only about my surroundings, but myself. For one, I seem to have become a small horse and a female one at that.
I also seem to be in a forest of some kind. Hang on. Is this the Everfree?
Oh, great. What do i do now?
Well, having powers on par with a Chaos Lord certainly might come in handy. Let's see what i can do with them, shall we?
Sex tag for sexual references and teen for teen reasons, plus a lot crass swearing.
And, just be warned, that random tag is serious. Random shit will happen in this fic, so be wary of that when entering and DO NOT expect anything to just be normal at any point.
In Popular Stories 31/12/2015. What a way to end the year!
Featured 24/7/2016. Okay. Honest to God did not see that coming.
Featured again 31/7/2016. Wait. What?
Featured 5/8/2016. Someone's pulling my leg here, right?
Featured again 26/8/2016. No. Wait. WHAT?
Despite everything, got Featured 16/2/2017. Just hope the next update does this justice
In Featured 2/07/2017. Um... How? Don't get me wrong, I'm glad, but... how?!
