After receiving a big, fat NO from Pinkie Pie's mom, Anon is worried that his mane-six MILF-quest was about to end in ignominious failure. Little did he know that, with a bit of Pinkie's help, he's about to become a breeding member of the Pie family.
Anon had managed to bag four of the six mares that comprised the prestigious pantheon of momly MILFs.
Starting with Twilight Velvet, then following on to Windy Whistles, Mrs. Shy, and finally his wild tryst with Cookie Crumbles and Rarity... Anon was beginning to get a bit of confidence that he might be able to actually pull off the seemingly impossible feat.
Only two remained.
First on his list would be the legendary rock-farming matriarch herself, the only being on the planet capable of withstanding the full maddening force of Pinkie's Pie's insatiable energy... Cloudy Quartz.
He had made arrangments to travel with Pinkie on one of her visits back to her family farm, using the pretense of wanting to taste their local rock-based homebrew craft beer. But it wasn't long before the ridiculous human spotted his opportunity - most of the Pie family (everypony sans Pinkie and Maud) out in the rock field attempting to fix their windmill.
Rarity's morning work-out with her mother reveals that Cookie is looking for more excitement in her sex life. Of COURSE Anon drops by at that exact moment! Can Rarity save her mom from his milf-hunting antics? Or will she be drawn in as well?
Rarity, Ponyville's resident fashion entrepreneur extraordinaire, has really been enjoying the retirement of her parents, Cookie Crumbles and Hondo Flanks, who've recently moved to Ponyville.
Not only does this new proximity mean that her little sister spends more time wither her parents, giving Rarity plenty of evenings all to herself (perfect for entertaining young male suitors) at the Carousel Boutique... but she also gets to spend more time with her beloved friend and mother: Cookie!
The pair had always got along famously... a filly really couldn't ask for more from a mother... but now they could enjoy each other's company all the time - including during their newly scheduled regular aerobic workouts. After this particular session, Cookie confides in Rarity that there's trouble in retirement paradise: her sex life with Hondo is not all that she'd hoped it would be.
Rarity is a bit embarrassed at first, but flattered that her mother would see her as such a trusted confidant. The feeling is quickly replaced by frustration as Cookie wonders if the solution to her marital woes might be a session with that strange human all the other mother's have been raving about.
Of course, Anon shows up at exactly that moment.
After some Anon-ical antics, Rarity finds herself being begged by her mother to accompany her - to coach her... reassure her... she's not exactly at Rarity's level of sexual sophistication and would love to have her daughter there to support her.
Will Rarity be able to protect her mother from his lewd clutches? Will Anon be unable to bed his fourth Mane 6 Milf? Will Rarity be able to resist her mother's pleas? Will Rarity avoid being drawn into a sweaty, sexy, incestuous three-way with her mother!?
Anon is called over to Fluttershy's cottage to do some handiwork. He's a bit surprised when Mrs. Shy answers and treats him to some friendly conversation and cookies. He'll be even more surprised when he finds out what he was hired for.
Anon has been pestered by Twilight to get a real job or move out of her castle. Wanting to find a middle-ground (and still be a complete deadbeat), he instead put up advertisements saying that he would help around town with odd jobs. It's been modestly profitable, and sporadic enough that he can still be the lazy troll that he is.
This time though, he's been summoned out to Fluttershy's cottage to do some handiwork, instead of his nemesis being there, it's her mother, Mrs. Shy! She treats Anon to some friendly conversation and comfort, as well as cookies before taking him to the depths of the cottage for the reason that she's hired him: To make a cuckold human-pony sex tape while her husband watches them.
Basically, Anon continues to fall into MILF heaven.
Also has a choose your own ending feature!
A quick clop story.
Warning! Contains: M/F, human on pony, Cuckolding, Blowjobs, PIV Sex, Anal, Mindbreak
If you were thrown into a world of technicolor ponies, what would you do? For the lone human Anonymous, he'll discover the insane and wacky world of Equestria after being whisked away from Earth via portal. With a few interesting side effects, Anon will go on a quest to remember his past while also learning about friendship...and all that fruity stuff.
"Mysterious alien-like being to ponykind equals riveting tale." ~The Gracious Articuno
"Watch how he dominates animals with this one weird trick!" ~Milos
"Kind of slice of life. I can just keep reading." ~spiketen
Anon is NOT having a jolly time in Equestria, but that might have something to do with being in some changeling hive as their prisoner, deep below ground. Just a thought.
Anon had been in Equestria for about two months, before he was ripped away from everything he loved and held dear...
That being his sweet king sized bed and all his stuffed animals, in the middle of the night. By some weird bug ponies no less.
He was having such sweet dreams...
(Author’s note: sex tag is used because of suggestive themes. Also, I haven’t written anything in two years, go easy on me, yuh?)
Anon is a macho manly man. He’s tough and resilient, coarse and rough. He takes no crap from anything or anyone. He is a strong independent green bean. He slays poon like no tomorrow.
He also has a griffin girlfriend. He likes it when she gives him cuddles.
It's been several months since the human, Anonymous, has taken permanent residence in Equestria with the bestest friends he could've asked for.
But life in this world is anything BUT normal. Having to deal with dogs, dance-offs and unfamiliar lands, Anon'll have to face the biggest threat of his life:
Galaxy Hair really wants to take over the whole day/night shtick, and y'know, just make it night for like, ever. Problem is, Anon wants to sleep, but forever is a long time so, yeah. He's gonna try and do something about that. Key word, 'try'.
An accidental magnum opus. With 1000 likes. What the fuck is wrong with you people.
Thanks for letting this get featured one last last time, you fucks
4/06/2019 Jesus, guys, I just wanna sleep 11/27/2019
. . . . .
You're Anon, the sole human of Equestria. You've been living there for, er... you can't really recall. A year, two maybe? Anyway, every year, from what you've gathered, there is one day. One goddamn day that really pisses you off. The 'Summer Sun Celebration' comes around every (your time) August 16th, and it is literally the longest day of the year.
You would have no problems with this—if only it didn't start at four in the fucking morning.
This year just seems to be extra against you; an evil deity that's been banished to the moon for a thousand-so years decides to come back, and boy is she a bitch.
As I've explained to LD, the rating bump from Teen to Mature wasn't exactly my call. A staff member kindly notified me of the rules regarding swearing in the long description of a Teen rated fic. There is no sex, no gore, just pure stupidity without the restraints of a T holding it back.
You're Anon, and you're in a strange, childlike place, and your job is to wash dishes.
This childish world stands no chance against your might, and your prowess of washing dishes. This is your journey to become the best dishwasher in all of pony land! Make friends, give talks on the birds and the bees, and become one with the art of underwater ceramics!
Who knows, one day, you might even do something that'll change the world!
As a wise man once said... "The dishes beckon, and I am their reckoning."
Two months ago, Anon was sent to Ponyville on Celestia's behest. Now, after not hearing from him, Celestia goes to investigate. She doesn't like what she finds. Neither will you.
Two months ago, Anon was sent to Ponyville on Celestia's behest. Now, after not hearing from him, Celestia goes to investigate (a bit belated, sure, but without that plot point the whole story falls apart so whatever). She doesn't like what she finds. Neither will you.
Not a clopfic despite the sex tag, but there is a ton of filthy language and imagery here written by a filthier mind. You've been warned.
Ponicemares risk skinned knees and noogies for the sake of the innocent. Now, if only Anon could get out of this desk job and actually make a difference... (RGRE)
Anon had a bad feeling when he saw the ice cream machine outside Firmly Asked Questions. Not only was the world softer and fluffier than he had anticipated, but he would also have to watch his weight.
Waking up in the middle of the woods, with a body not of his own, Anon learns to adjust. Adjust to what? Mares wanting to care for him, suck him off, and fuck him like all the other sensitive stallions. Can he face the world with his pride intact?
But he won't be able to do it alone. Too many crazy mares, strange stallions, and mysteries stand in his way. Anon will need a guide. Can Twilight Sparkle be the friend that he needs? Can she show him the new world without jumping at him for herself?
[Cover me for a coffee or chill with the gang on the Discord.]
Anon is tired of Twilight's questions. Twilight isn't tired of asking questions. Chaos ensues.
Anonymous, the only human in Equestria, has long had to place a limit on the number of questions Twilight can ask about humans. Thing is, Twilight clearly needs to know about human adrenaline. Obviously, the only solution is to rope the whole town into a huge scheme to get him to use it.
Anon becomes a deep-tissue massage therapist in Equestria. Like... elbow-deep.
Anon had a normal life of being a massage therapist. And then one day he accidentally opened a portal to Equestria. As the only human in this new land, it would be a shame if his magic fingers went to waste.
So he decides to work as a deep-tissue masseur at the spa with Aloe and Lotus. Ponies from all over Equestria come to work out their problems, stress and kinks. Anon: part-time masseur, full-time therapist.
Now about that happy ending...
A comment-driven episodic story. Each chapter focuses on a different character. After each chapter, YOU, the readers, nominate and vote on who you want to visit Anon for a massage next! Simply comment which character you want to visit, and after (an arbitrary amount of time)the character with the most upvotes will be next! (Duplicate nomination wont have their scores added together.) It can be any creature from MLP, even an OC! If your character doesn't get the most votes, don't despair! You can always nominate them again on the NEXT chapter.
Anon has a problem. A problem that will not leave him alone. Neither will Main Six or some of the other ponies around him.
This just silly rom/com that will probably have some clop in it. I just found this picture and I really wanted to write something about it. I don't know who artist is as the watermark is hard to see and I found it on facebook.
Edited: Artist is Ponut Joe. Thank you CHdz
EDITED: I GOT FEATURED. HOLY FUCKING SHIT. DATE: 12/26/19
Please leave comment if you leave a like. I would really love comments ;w;
ANOTHER EDIT: I know this shameless and I hope this doesn't ruin fic for anyone but, I have Patreon now. If you want support me or get me to write fanfic idea. Feel free to support me here. https://www.patreon.com/user?u=210006
Luna happens upon a particularly unflattering dream, and now Anon is the town pariah of Ponyville. As he seeks to prove his innocence, he cannot help but come to one conclusion. Ponies are weird. Warning: This is pure id-fic, which is to say, writing whatever was appealing at the time. 0% literary depth.
